Tummy Twigger

Keep Smiling!!!!!! (¨`•.•´¨) It Is The Second `•.¸(¨`•.•´¨) Best Thing U Can Do (¨`•.•´¨)¸.•´ With Your Lips! `•.¸.•´

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Images.... of Rajni!!

Thus is e-mail id is: gmail@rajnikant.com

Perfect with his Physics!!

More of the Rajni!!

If you spell Rajnikanth in scrabble, you win. FOREVER.

Rajnikanth doesn’t get frostbite. He bites frost.

Outer space exists only because it’s afraid to be on the same planet as Rajnikanth.

Rajnikanth played Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

They once made Rajnikanth toilet paper but it didnt work. Rajnijanth doesnt take shit from ANYBODY.

Rajnikanth sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

There is no such thing as evolution. It’s just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.

Rajnikanth can divide by zero.

Rajinikanth can judge a book by it’s cover.

Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.

Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.

Rajinikanth can make onions cry.

Rajinikanth doesn’t breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.

Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.

Rajinikanth has already been to Mars. That’s why there are no signs of life there.

Rajinikanth doesn’t move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.

Rajinikanth knows Victoria’s secret.

When Rajnikanth hits you, even google can’t find you.

Rajnikanth doesn’t do push-ups. He pushes the earth down.

Superman can fly. Rajnikanth can make others fly.

Time waits for Rajnikanth. And he can kill time too.

Dead sea died because Rajnikanth killed it.

If you ask Rajnikanth what time it is, he says “2 seconds till” . After you ask “till what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

Rajnikanth does not wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

His email id: gmail@rajnikanth.com!

His email id: rajnikanth@hotmale.com

Rajnikanth can drown a fish.

Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep.

Once, a cobra bit Rajinikanth. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

Rajinikanth and Superman once made a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underpants on the outside.

Rajinikanth was once in a knife fight: And the knife lost.

When Rajinikanth gets pulled over, he lets the cop off with a warning.

It takes Rajinikanth 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

Rajinikanth bit the apple in the Apple logo.

Death once had a near-Rajinikanth experience.

Rajinikanth kicked Neo out of Zion , now Neo is “The Two”.

Rajinikanth sleeps with the light on. Not because he is afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of him.

Rajinikanth once played the Wheel Of Fortune. It is still spinning.

Rajinikanth can set water on fire. He can also set fire on water.

Rajinikanth can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.

Rajinikanth made a Happy Meal cry.

Rajinikanth can kill two stones with one bird.

Rajinikanth knows the last digit of pi.

Rajinikanth is so fast that he can lock the drawer and leave the keys inside.

Rajinikanth can squeeze orange juice out of a banana.

The Chennai – Delhi Rajdhani Express once missed Rajinikanth. It ran as fast as it could but failed to catch him.

Rajinikanth was once shot in the heart. The bullet died.

When Rajinikanth had surgery, the anesthesia was given to the doctors.

The dinosaurs aren’t extinct. They’re just hiding from Rajinikanth.

Rajinikanth called 911 to order Chinese, and got it.

Stars wish upon Rajinikanth.

What would happen if Rajnikanth enters the BigBoss house? “Rajnikanth chahte hain ki BigBoss confession room mein aa jayen”

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

What Rajini can't.... Nothing!

1. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea.

2. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.

3. There is no such thing as evolution, it's just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.

4. Rajinikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile.

5 .Rajnikanth can divide by zero.

6. Rajinikanth can judge a book by it's cover.

7. Rajinikanth can drown a fish.

8. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.

9. Rajinikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs.

10. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door.

11. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.

12. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald's, and got it.

13. Rajinikanth can win at Solitaire with only 18 cards.

14. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of the corners off.

15. Rajinikanth can build a snowman out of rain.

16. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.

17. Rajinikanth can make onions cry.

18. Rajinikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

19. Rajinikanth can watch the show 60 minutes in 20 minutes.

20. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice.

21. Rajinikanth will attain separate statehood in 2013.

22. Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day.

23. Rajinikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost.

24. Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano.

25. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.

26. The only man who ever outsmarted Rajinikanth was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved.

27. Rajinikanth can talk about Fight Club.

28. Rajinikanth doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.

29. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Rajinikanth lives in Chennai.

30. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.

31. Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.

32. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.

33. Rajinikanth doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.

34. Rajinikanth knows Victoria's secret.

35. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it.

36. Rajinikanth can throw the Thackerays out of Mumbai.

37. Rajinikanth kills two stones with one bird.

38. Google won't find Rajinikanth because you don't find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you.

39. Rajinikanth gave the Joker those scars.

40. Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep.

41. Rajinikanth once warned a young girl to be good "or else". The result? Mother Teresa.

42. Rajinikant electrocuted Iron Man.

43. Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.

44. Rajinikanth can make PCs better than the Mac.

45. Rajinikanth puts the 'laughter' in manslaughter.

46. Rajinikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.

47. Rajinikanth can handle the truth.

48. Rajinikanth can speak Braille.

49. Rajinikanth can dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks.

50. Rajinikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.

51. Rajinikanth calls Voldemort by his name.

52. Who do you think taught Voldemort Parseltongue? Rajinikanth did.

53. Chuck Norris once met Rajinikanth. The result - He was reduced to a joke on the internet.

54. Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated.

55. Rajinikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth.

56. Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

57. The last time Rajinikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it. The other guy just disintegrated. Resonance.

58. Rajinikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.

59. Rajinikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

60. Rajinikanth can run at speed of light around a tree and screw himself.

61.Rajinikant can lick his elbows.

62. Rajinikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

63. Rajinikant does not get frostbite. Rajnikant bites frost.

64. Rajinikant doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

65. Rajinikant got his drivers license at the age of 16 seconds.

66. When you say “no one is perfect”, Rajinikant takes this as a personal insult.

67. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajinikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.

68. Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajinikanth was born.

69. The statement "nobody can cheat death", is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.

70. When Rajnikanth is asked to kill some one he doesn't know, he shoots the bullet and directs it the day he finds out.

71. Rajinikant can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin.

72. Rajinikanth knows what women really want.

73. Time and tide wait for Rajinikanth.

74. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that's when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.

75. As a child when Rajinikanth had dyslexia, he simply re-scripted the alphabet.

76. Rajinikanth collects Honey from his private Moon - HoneyMoon.

77. Rajinikanth can answer a missed call.

78. Rajinikanth doesn't need a visa to travel abroad, he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates.

79. Rajinikanth's brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury's.

80. Rajinikanth doesn't shower. He only takes blood baths.

81. To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Rajinikanth.

82. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Rajinikanth's fist.

83. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajinikanth, there is no other way.

84. Rajinikanth's every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog.

85. Rajinikant doesn’t bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint out of fear.

86. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Rajinikant”.

87. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was feeling cold, so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up.

88. Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

89. Rajinikanth is a champion in the game "Hide n' seek", as no one can hide from Rajinikanth.

90. Rajinikant proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction.

91. Rajinikant is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world.

92. Aliens do indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Rajinikanth is on.

93. We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth.

94. If at first you don't succeed, you're not Rajinikanth.

95. Rajinikanth's first job was as a bus conductor. There were no survivors.

96. Rajinikanth does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

97. When Rajinikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.

98. Rajinikanth is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

99. Rajinikanth's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Find "x" in the follow problem! ???...!! #@!

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Indian boy on 1st day at school in USA

Indian boy on his first day at school in USA.......... awesome

Here is a funny joke about an Indian boy on his first day at school inthe USA .

It was the first day of school and a new student named Chandrashekhar Subrahmanyam entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History.

Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death"?

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrashekhar, who had hishand up: "Patrick Henry, 1775" he said.

"Very good!" Who said "Government of the People, by the People, for thePeople, shall not perish from the Earth?"again no response except from Chandrashekhar.

"Abraham Lincoln, 1863" saidChandrashekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed.Chandrashekhar, who is new to our country, knows more! About its history than you do."

She heard a loud whisper: "F**k the Indians,""Who said that?" she demanded.

Chandrashekhar put his hand up. "General Custer, 1862."

At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."

The teacher glares around and asks "All right! Now, who said that?"

Again, Chandrashekhar says, "George Bush to the Japanese PrimeMinister, 1991."

Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? S*ck this!"

Chandrashekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to theteacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

Now with almost a mob hysteria someone said "You little shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you."

Chandrashekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Gary Conditto Chandra Levy, 2001."

The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, "Oh shit, we're f**ked!"

And Chandrashekhar said quietly, "George Bush, Iraq, 2005."

Thursday, July 06, 2006


C----- Come
O----- On
L------ Lets
L------ Love
E----- Each
G----- Girl or guy
E------Equally !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Engineers AnthemHum hoge all clear Ek din, Mann me hai vishwas, pura hai vishwas, humhoge all clear ek dinMale Engineers PrayerAllah ke naam pe ek girl friend de de babaDoosre ki nahi to apni he de de babaAllah tujhe ek ke badle do degaHillary hogi to Monika bhi degaExamsexams ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aayaKUCH TO HUA HAI KUCH HO GAYA HAI,exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aayaSAB KUCH ALAG HAI SAB KUCH NAYA HAI.Engineers' ShayariWoh Padosi hi kya Jiski khoobsurat Kuwari beti na ho!!Woh engineering hi kya Jisme K.T. na ho!!!Top two Engineering Rumours'Did you hear the results are being put up today at 5:30pm''Did you hear the exams are postponed by two weeks, its been put up at Govt. college ,I got the timetable for this exams'The most dreaded acronym for EngineersATKT ( After Trying Keep Trying)( Aaj Thoda Kal Thoda)The most important criteria while selecting an engineering collegeGirl to Boy ratio ( if more than 0.025% than that college is engineers dream come true)Engineers at workAssignments solved by one and then carrying out mass transferoperations throughout the classThe most important machine for EngineersXerox Machine ( Without which assignment completion wouldn't be possible)The most important table in an Engineers HouseThe glass table ( to carry out GT operations all night long)The only que an Engineer is familiar withSubmission QueAn Engineers favorite watchBird Watch !

ENgg. Definitions:Engineering College : Place where you're punished for getting good HSC marks.Senior: guys who got ragged as juniors and wanna get some payback...Fresher: Guy who has to ask where the canteen is...Really Dumb Fresher: Guy who asks a senior where the canteen is.Really Really Dumb fresher: guy who follows the senior to the canteen.Ragging: The unfortunate fate of the previous idiot.Babe: After two years in Engineering, anything remotely female qualifies that title. Beautiful: 99.99% of the girls are beautiful, rest 0.01% are in my college.
Couple: Rich/Handsome/Intelligent Guys(But everyone pity on them...."Poor Guys") and Girls(Not beautiful strictly.....Coz they are not meant for Engg.) going together.
Female: Anything Female.
KT: makes you suicidal...Year Drop: makes dad homicidal.Reevaluation: Cruel joke taking its own time to make you cry... (Results of revel come after you give the KT exam).Principal: Biggest idiot on campus. Unfortunately also the mostpowerful idiot on campus.Fear: what you feel when the prof who's signature you forged on the journal hesitates to turn the page...Irony: The guy who copied your entire paper passes and you flunk.Critical Calculation: Summing up the marks you attempted in the exam...Sleep: Huh! What the heck's that? ...
Night outs: A Compulsory substitute of Sleeps. Lecturers: The biggest Devils in Human, with basic characteristic of torturing students. HOD: The Don of Devils who's to be worshipped as GOD. Marks: Unexpected figures we get after exams. Term Work: Nothing to do with the work in term. Oral: Where two people sit and only one person speaks...................................the other is student. Submission work: The work which is to be completed during the submission going on. Submission: Mission impossible made possible..........somehow Common Engineering Dialogues after a paper.'What is this pal, more than 60% of the paper was out of the syllabus''This was the worst paper set in the entire engineering history''I am failing’! 'I got screwed royally' 'This was never asked before' 'Time nahi mila'(ironically most of those make such comments get 1st class and those who think they will survive somehow get K.T.)Feeling after Completing EngineeringSurvived Engineering Have a great life with good jobs. -A Survivor. Enjoy!!!!!

Sardar again....

1. Sardar comes back 2 his car & finds a note saying "Parking Fine"
He writes a note and sticks it 2 pole "Thanks 4 d complement"

2 . How do you recognize a Sardar in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.

3. Once a Sardar was walking and had a glove on one hand and not on other so the man asked him why did he do so? He replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.

4. Sardarji bought a brand new Maruti and decided to drive down from Amritsar , where he lived, to Jalandar to meet his friend. He reached therein a few hours. After spending a few days there, he decided to return, and called up his mother to expect him in the evening. But he didn't reach inthe evening and not the next day either. When he finally reached home on the third day, his mother ran and asked him " Arre Puttar, kihoya?"
The Sardarji got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said,"Oy, ye Marutti wale pagal hain, agge jaane waaste chaar gear banaate hain,aur pichche jaane waaste sirf ik?"

5. Teacher: Can you tell me something about Raja Ram Mohan Roy?
Saradji: They were 4 best friends..!

6. How can a Sardar Kill a Lion?
Sardarji thinks N thinks hard & comes to aconclusion:
I'll drink poison n let lion eat me.
O' bolo ta ra ra.

7. Sardar: Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying....
When aPerson asked what he was doing.... He replied... Oye!! Higher StudiesYaar...!!!

8. Sardar with a new mobile called everyone from his Phone Book & said "MyMobileNo. has changed Earlier it was Nokia 3310 Now it is 6610"

9. Sardar falls in Love with Nurse. He writes a Love letter to her, " ILOVE U SISTER."

10. What is Common between: Krishna , Ram, Gandhi ji & Jesus..?
Sardar ji Replied: All are born on Government Holidays.

11. Santa : That Cow is a Lovely Colour
Farmer : Yes, it's a Jersey
Santa: Oh, I thought it was its Skin...!!!

12. Sardar Son: O God! Please make New York the capital of Punjab .
Sardar: Why are you praying for that?
Sardar Son: That is what I have written in my exam

13. Santa : I am a Proud Sardar, My son is in Medical College.
Banta : Really, what is he studying,
Santa : No he is not studying, they are Studying him.

14. Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad, what should I write for mother tongue.?
Santa: Very long!

15.Santa went out to buy an Indian flag.The shop owner gave him the flag.Guess what did he ask next...
Ismein aur colour dikhayiye.

16.Santa went to battery shop n asked to change battery.
The shopkeeper asked: Exide laga du?
Santa: Dusri side tera baap lagayega kya?

17.Frog: Tumhare paas dimaag nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai & jumps into the well.
Santa: Isme suicide karne waali kya baat thi.?

18.Santa was caught for speeding and went before the judge.
The judge: What'll you take 30 days or Rs 3000.
Santa: I think I'll take the money.

19.Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.
Banta: Santa u'll die.
Santa: No, u'll die b'coz haven't u heard train is coming on platform?

20. A Man asked Santa, "Akal badhi ya bhains?”
A: Santa bola, "Pehle date of birth to batao."

21. Why was Santa writing the exam near the door?
A: Because it was an entrance exam.

22.What's Ford?
Santa: Gaadi.
What's Oxford?Santa: So simple, Bail Gaadi!!!

23.Santa: My dad was an extremely brave man. He once entered a lion's cage.
Banta: He probably got a lot of applause when he got out.
Santa: I didn't say he got out.

24.Santa found answer to the most difficult question ever - What comes first - the chicken or the egg?
O yaar, jiska order pehle doge, vo ayega!

25.Santa (reading from book of facts): "Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?"Banta: "Why don't you use a mouth wash?"

26.Banta Singh was a business graduate, and had been out
of school for several years. He had established a
furniture store and was doing quite well. He decided
to expand the lines he carried by adding some
expensive French furniture he knew no one else in town

He scheduled a buying trip to France. Banta's first
day in Paris was very successful and he found a number
of pieces he thought he could profitably sell back
home. After the arrangements were made to begin
shipping this furniture home, he decided to celebrate
with a glass of wine in a small sidewalk cafe.

The place was jammed, but he managed to find an empty
table. Just about the time his wine arrived, a
beautiful girl came by and motioned to the empty chair
at his table with a questioning look on her face.

He assumed she wanted to sit with him and nodded his
head "yes." The girl sat down with him. The girl tried
to talk to him, but, alas, he understood not one word
of French. He tried to talk to her, but, alas, she
understood not one word of Punjabi. He had an idea. He
took a napkin and drew a wine glass and a question
mark. She nodded her head "yes." They sat quietly
enjoying their wine.

When it was just about finished, Banta realized it was
nearly time for dinner. He took another napkin and
drew a picture of two people at a table eating dinner.
She nodded her head "yes" and took him by the hand.
She led him down the street to a very nice restaurant.
They went in. The girl spoke with the head waiter and
they were seated in a quiet corner where they could
hear the band playing and see the dance floor. Banta
could not read the menu since it was in French, so he
allowed the girl to order for him. The food was
excellent and the couple thoroughly enjoyed it.

After dinner, Banta took a napkin and drew a picture
of a couple dancing. She nodded her head "yes" and
they danced to every song the band played, whether
fast or slow. When the band quit playing and began to
pack away their instruments,the couple returned to
their table.

The girl took a napkin and reached for Banta's pen.He
handed it to her and she drew a picture of a four
poster bed.................!

Banta is still wondering to this day how she knew he
was in the furniture business !

27.A sardarji goes for a job interview in an office.
The interviewer starts with the basics. "So, Mr., can you tell us your age, please?"
The sardarji counts carefully on his fingers for half a minute before replying. "Um ... 22."
The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. "And can you tell us your height, please?"
The sardarji stands up and produces a measuring tape from his handbag..he then traps one end under his foot and extends the tape to the top of his head. he checks the measurement and announces, "Five foot two!"
This isn't looking good so the interviewer goes for the real basics; something the he won't have to count, measure, or lookup. "Just to confirm for our records, your name please?"
The sardarji bobs his head from side to side for about fifteen seconds!
Mouthing something silently to himself, before replying, "Gurpreet!”.
The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he asks, "What were you doing when I asked you your name?""Oh, that!" replies the sardarji," I was just running through that song, 'Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you...Happy Birthday dear Gurpreet...happy birthday to you...'."

28.sardar kya sochte sochte marr gaya ???
agar meri bahan se do bhai hain, to mera sirf ek kaise ?

29.Sardar Apni Wife Ke Sath Coffee Shop Gaya, hot Coffee order Ki, Coffee Atte Hi wife Se Bola Jaldi Jaldi pee.
Wife Boli Kyu?
Sardar Bola Hot coffe Rs. 5 and Cold Coffee Rs. 10.00

30.Sardarji went to party and introduced his family to his friends. I am Sardar and this is sardarney, this is my kid and this is my kidney.

31.Sardar 2 Salesman, I Need Pink curtains for my computer.
Salesman Sardarji Computer Doesnt Need Curtains.
Sardarji: Oye i have windows installed.

32.Nurse: Sardarji Mubarak Ho Aap Papa Ban Gaye!!
Sardar: Meri Wife Ko Mat Bolna Main Usse Surprise Dunga!!

33.A sardarji went to a STD/ISD/PCO SHOP and slapped the operator twice.
because there it was written "Number dial karne se pehele do lagae"

Friday, June 23, 2006

Tongue Twister - Try it and enjoy

A good cook could cook as much cookies as a good cook who could cook cookies

I saw a saw that could out saw any other saw I ever saw.

Betty Botter bought some butter, but she said "this butter's bitter! But a bitof better butter will but make my butter better" So she bought some betterbutter, better than the bitter butter, and it made her butter better so 'twasbetter Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter!

Black bug bit a big black bear. But where is the big black bear that the big black bug bit?

A big bug bit the little beetle but the little beetle bit the big bug back.

If you understand, say "understand".If you don't understand, say "don't understand".But if you understand and say "don't understand".How do I understand that you understand? Understand!

I thought, I thought of thinking of thanking you.


I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.

if a sledering snail went down a slippery slide would a snail sleder or slide down the slide- By S.Walton

bubble bobble, bubble bobble, bubble bobble

These thousand tricky tongue twisters trip thrillingly off the tongue .

Sounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds.

Lala Gope Gappungam Das.

You curse, I curse, we all curse, for asparagus!

Kacha papaya pacca papaya Kacha papaya pacca papaya Kacha papaya pacca papaya.

Double bubble gum, bubbles double.

A sailor went to sea To see, what he could see. And all he could see Was sea, sea, sea.

A box of mixed biscuits, a mixed biscuit box.

Upper roller lower roller Upper roller lower roller. ...

Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People

If two witches were watching two watches, which witch would watch which watch?

Which watch did which witch wear and which witch wore which watch? .

Six slippery snails, slid slowly seaward.

I thought a thought.But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought.If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought, I wouldn't have thought so much.

Once a fellow met a fellow In a field of beans. Said a fellow to a fellow, "If a fellow asks a fellow, Can a fellow tell a fellow What a fellow means?"

How much wood could a wood chuck; chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!

An Ape hates grape cakes.

She sells sea shells on the sea shore she sells sea shells no more

I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit. And on a slitted sheet I sit. I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit. The sheet I slit, that sheet was it.

Any noise annoys an oyster but a noisy noise annoys an oyster more.


A skunk sat on a stump. The stump thought the skunk stunk. the skunk thought the stump stunk . What stunk the skunk or the stump?

The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside outside his inside inn.

If one doctor doctors another doctor does the doctor who doctors the doctor doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors? Or does the doctor doctor the way the doctor who doctors doctors?

baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo......

My Bhaiya buys black Bananas by the bunch.

The thirty-three thieves thought that they thrilled the throne throughout Thursday.

Daddy draws doors.Daddy draws doors.Daddy draws doors.

Do tongue twisters twist your tongue?

Friendly Fleas and Fire Flies

If you notice this notice, you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, FuzzyWuzzy wasn't very fuzzy... was he???

How many cans can a canner can, if a canner can can cans?A canner can can as many cans as a canner can, if a canner can can cans.

How much wood could a wood chopper chop, if a wood chopper could chop wood?

If a black bug bleeds black blood, what color blood does a blue bug bleed?

If Freaky Fred Found Fifty Feet of Fruit and Fed Forty Feet to his Friend Frank how many Feet of Fruit did Freaky Fred Find?

Penny's pretty pink piggy bank

"When a doctor falls ill another doctor doctor's the doctor. Does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctor the doctor in his own way or does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctors the doctor in the doctor's way"

A tutor who tooted the flute, tried to tutor two tooters to toot. Said the two to the tutor, 'Is it harder to toot or to tutor two tooters to toot?'

One smart fellow, he felt smart. Two smart fellows, they felt smart. Three smart fellows, they all felt smart.

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,if Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,wheres the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?

Black bug's blood.
Crisp crusts crackle and crunch.

It's not the cough that carries you off, it's the coffin they carry you off in!

Tie a knot, tie a knot.Tie a tight, tight knot.Tie a knot in the shape of a nought.

Freshly-fried fat flying fish

Rubber baby-buggy bumpers.

Jolly juggling jesters jauntily juggled jingling jacks.

Kindly kittens knitting mittens keep kazooing in the king's kitchen.

Billy Button bought a buttered biscuit,
did Billy Button buy a buttered biscuit?
If Billy Button bought a buttered biscuit,
Where's the buttered biscuit Billy Button bought ??

A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk,but the stump thunk the skunk stunk

Disorder in the Court...

Too good !!!

There is a book called Disorder in the Court. These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. Some of these are excellent - Don't miss the last one.
Q: What is your date of birth?

A: July fifteenth.

Q: What year?

A: Every year.
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the accident?

A: Gucci sweat-shirt and Reeboks.
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?

A: Yes.

Q: And what were you doing at that time?
Q: She had three children, right?

A: Yes.

Q: How many were boys?

A: None.

Q: Were there any girls?
------------------------ ---------------------
Q How was your first marriage terminated?

A: By death.

Q: By whose death was it terminated?
Q: Can you describe the individual?

A: He was about medium height and had a beard.

Q: Was this a male, or a female?
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?

A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

A: Oral.
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?

A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him.

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when h e woke up that morning?

A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"

Q: And why did that upset you?

A: My name is Susan.
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?

A: No.

Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

Saturday, June 17, 2006

BLOCKBUSTERS...of Sardarji

Sardar: I hav'nt slept all nite in the train.
Friend: Y?
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Y didn't u Xchnge?
Sardar: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchnge in the lower Berth..

Sardar tells a girl "Come 2 my house at night, nobody will b there.............
Girl goes at night & really nobody was there

A SARDAR went 2 a BANK to open a S.B. A/C. After seeing the Form he had gone to DELHI for Filling up.
U knows y?

Sardar had twins; he named them Tin Martin.
Again had twins & named Peter & Repeater.
again twins & named Max & Climax.
Again d same.
disgusted Sardar named them TIRED & RETIRED!

A sardharji photographer focusing a dead body's face in a funeral function, suddenly all relatives beat him why?

Sardarji standing below a tube light with a open mouth.................
because his doctor advised him "Todays dinner should be light"_-=


One sardarji professor asked a plumber to come to his college.
U knw Why?
Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking...

Santa! Your daughter has died!
Sardar jumps from 100th floor At 50th floor he remembers I don't have a daughter!
At 25flr:I'm unmarried!
At 10flr:I'm Banta not santa !!!!!!


Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever - What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order first will come first.

A dog was chasing a Sardar and the Sardar was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar: I have a Air cell phone but still hutch network is following me.

A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match. All were busy writing except one Sardarji.

What does a sardar do after taking a xerox?
He will compare it with the original for any spelling mistakes.


Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
Sardar says...
Drink quickly......
Wife asks why...
sardar says hot coffee Rs5 and cold coffee Rs10

A Sardar & his wife filed an application 4 Divorce.
Judge asked: How'll U divide, U"VE 3 children?
Sardar replied: Ok! We"ll apply NEXT YEAR

Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!

Sardar news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab . Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..

Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
Man says CHIN YU YAN n dies.
Srdr goes2 china 2 find meaning of friends last words. It is 'U R STANDNG ON D OXGN TUBE!"

Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing He said-im seeing how i look while sleeping.